“Ridiculously unreasonable, unsound, or incongruous…”

Owen is a sweet, endearing boy by all accounts – which I think is the perception we all have because he smiles a lot and has a beautiful face.  But it’s not like he makes me tea or tells cute jokes at the dinner table – Owen actually doesn’t, can’t, do anything.   And [...]

This is Not a Blog

When a blog topic occurs to me, I let it stew for a while.  Sometimes weeks.  Then I write it in one go, editing ruthlessly along the way.  This blog is not a day-to-day journal – more a collection of essays.
So perhaps a little snapshot of our ‘real lives’ is in order.  [Photo above: Owen [...]

Keep Calm and Carry On

As Owen gets bigger and more wiggly I can sense the forthcoming horrific decisions that are coming my way.  He is not that heavy yet (48 lbs) nor is he that tall (drat, I forget…  he’s short) but consider his size when he’s doing his best imitation of a greased seal and you’ll perhaps appreciate [...]

I must have been a Buddhist in a past life.

I have spent the past 11 years fending off misconceptions that I must hate my life and that I must be angry or depressed about my son.  Often those misconceptions come from people without direct experience with disability – sometimes I explain, but mostly I just continue to live my life as authentically as possible, [...]

Impolitic

(I got it!  It came to me this morning.  And it’s so very unCanadian.)
I am not going to help you through your discomfort and make it all better.  I can’t.  And I don’t want to.  ‘This’ is not just happening to me – you are here too, seeing, reacting, feeling.  Something is happening to you [...]

My Theory of Relativity

Sometimes I cheer people up.   Not because I try to, but because sometimes people will compare their own stresses to what they assume are mine and will be drawn to ‘count their blessings’.  I suppose I should live and let live, but I am drawn to comment…
(I find this type of post hard to write, [...]

Do Not Resuscitate

I had one signed this week.  (The form is signed by a physician, not the parent.)  After months of sitting on the document, I decided to finally just do it.
It wasn’t actually a fraught decision;  I have always known my own limits for what interventions for Owen are acceptable and what are not.  The standard [...]

Good enough

I am watching my boys growing and I am stunned at how quickly their childhoods are giving way to eventual adulthood.  I get ahead of myself a bit perhaps – they’re only 9 and 11 – but they’re over half way to what we typically think of as ‘grown up’.  So I feel entitled to [...]

Compassion Fatigue

(Photo: not always a poster boy!)
[Apologies in advance to those I offend with the following post.]
A friend of mine used a term the other day:  compassion fatigue.  A numbness to the horrors of a particular situation, usually due to overexposure or experience.  It’s a risk to which all front-line healthcare and caregiver professionals are exposed [...]

HealthCamp

I attended a fabulous un-conference*  yesterday about healthcare.
I knew in advance I would want to lead a session (anyone can if they like) and I mulled over 4 topics:

finding ways to extract and package parent knowledge to better inform healthcare practices
finding ways, through opt-in social networking strategies, to connect people with similar diagnoses (or other [...]